Ivanka Trump is Pregnant

Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner are expecting their first child. Hopefully it’ll take on Ivanka’s genes and come out with a floppy toupee and a sour expression yelling “you’re fired” to its umbilical cord.

“I have been wanting to share some amazing news with you all for some time… I’m pregnant!” the Celebrity Apprentice co-host and jewelry designer, 29, wrote on her Twitter account Friday. “Jared and I couldn’t be more excited.” The mom-and-dad-to-be stepped out in NYC on Thursday night, catching a special screening of No Strings Attached, hosted by the Cinema Society and DKNY Jeans with DeLeón Tequila.

Ivanka’s famous mogul dad Donald Trump tells of the news: “I am very happy for Ivanka and Jared. They are wonderful young people!”

Judging by the way he describes his own daughter, Donald sounds like he’ll be a very warm granddad. When Ivanka gives birth, Donald will call it matter-of-factly,  “a fine grandson/granddaughter, very pink,” and then he’ll clear his throat and remind everyone to watch The Apprentice, Mondays at 8/9 central while offering them a Werther’s Original.

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