ESC

Donald Sterling Was Just Trying to Get Laid

Donald Sterling is telling friends he only said those racist things to have sex with V. Stiviano. Sterling says the comments he made were all part of a bigger plan to turn her on. Kind of weird it didn’t work because saying stuff like, “You can’t hang out with black people in public. Are you wet now?!,” usually does.

The most surprising thing here is V. Stiviano never had sex with Sterling. If I bought some chick a 2012 Ferrari, two Bentleys and a 2013 Range Rover, I’d expect at least a handy.

Though to be fair, the idea of some old man’s saggy balls slapping her in the stomach while he does her from behind is probably not the most erotic thing.

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