Nicki Minaj Taught Models How to do the Anaconda Dance

A series of Vines from Vogue shows Nicki Minaj attempting to teach a bunch of models how to shake their ass like in her video for “Anaconda.” It turned out terrible. One, because none of the models really had any ass. Two, because they had about as much rhythm as two epileptic blind kids having sex for the first time.

Take this one, for example. Nicki shows them that they’re supposed to have their backs flat when they shake their ass. Except, they don’t get it and they just look like frightened cats.

This one was a little better. If it wasn’t for that one girl who looked like one of the soldiers who lost their legs in Saving Private Ryan and is now trying to crawl for cover.

The same girl who failed earlier lessons failed this one too. I’m not sure she has enough muscle to even lift her legs.

Also note how, instead of fanning herself, that one girl seems to be slapping herself like some sort of wild, gay ape.

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Man, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want to watch this while I’m eating! I will have to say that Ms. Minaj is looking almost life-like!

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