Taylor Swift and Joe Alwyn’s Relationship Is Part of a Large Secret Plot

Aside from writing multiple songs about him, Taylor Swift has kept Joe Alwyn out of her public life. How does the biggest pop star in the world keep her relationship private? Well, for starters, she doesn’t allow him out in public wearing an “I <3 TS” shirt.

But it goes well beyond that.

According to E! News, she takes a private jet to London. Then takes a private car to Alwyn’s house. Alright, that’s not too unusual. But she goes a step further by rarely going out in public with Alwyn. Instead, they have a bunch of Netflix and chill nights.

Taylor has met his family. Everyone approves of everyone. Blah blah blah. They seem very happy.

Barf.

What is she really hiding? Something has to be wrong with him for her to be this secretive. Don’t worry, folks. Jennifer Lawrence and I, of the famous JLaw and JLam Spy Services agency, will get to the bottom of this. First, we will find out if Swift and Karlie Kloss are still friends. Next, we will solve the mystery of Joe Alwyn.

We’re already starting to learn more about Swift’s relationship with Alwyn. And it’s not surprising that this most recent news is coming from E! You know E!, the network partially owned by the Kardashians. Swift wants to keep her romance a secret and here is the Kardashian network out here trying to expose them.

Let these two lovebirds live in peace. Unless it’s Jennifer Lawrence and I working together to find their secrets. There is no malicious intent behind our research. We’re two concerned friends. E! Network on the other hand. They’re just trying to line the Kardashian pockets.