A Wave Almost Took Kate Upton From Us

This is not a drill. We almost lost Kate Upton.

Alright, Sports Illustrated. I love what you do for women and men. The swimsuit magazine is the reason magazines have not died. But we cannot continue to take risks like this. We just can’t.

Upton was shooting in Aruba while standing on a rock. That’s when Mother Nature sent a wave up her butt. If you watch the video you’ll see one of the production assistant’s valiantly try to save her, but no dice. Upton get knocked her off that rock straight into the water. Even worse, the video is uncensored. SMH!

Kate Upton is a national treasure. You can’t put her in harm’s way like this. Everyone knew this could spell trouble, but they tried it anyway. And look what happened. WE ALMOST LOST KATE UPTON.

I’m sorry. I’m just devastated. If they’re willing to put Kate Upton in this spot, what do they do to everyone else? Kate Upton is the biggest star they have and they were ready to have a wave take her life like it was nothing. Rookie of the Year Alexis Ren probably had to stick her head in a gator’s mouth even though they had no intentions of using photos of her and the gator.

This is hazing at the worst level and I won’t stand for it. Until further notice, I’m hereby boycotting the swimsuit edition of the magazine.

Thankfully, Upton was ok. And I admire the dude who got up there to try and lend a helping hand. But Upton is such a trooper that refused the help. Probably didn’t want to show the guy her boobs.

Don’t do this again, SI. Protect Kate Upton at all costs.

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but please, don’t objectify me.

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