Brandon Davis

Oil heir Brandon Davis had a debacle at Paris Hilton’s birthday party a week or two ago. In addition to throwing stuff at Paula Abdul, he was making fun of her Middle Eastern heritage.

“He kept on saying her last name over and over again, and then would insert his made-up version of an Arabic language.”

As it turns out, his his last name isn’t Davis, it’s Zarif from his father Nebil Zarif, a Turkish-American wine importer. Brandon’s grandfather, Marvin Davis, never approved of Nebil and his mother Nancy’s marriage and basically paid Nebil to leave. Luckily, everyone already knew Brandon Zarif is a complete retard. It saves people the trouble of explaining why. On another note, why is he so sweaty? I’ve seen less perspiration in Jenny Craig on chase the donut-mobile day. He leaves a salty puddle everywhere he goes. He’s like a slug, but uglier.