Jessica Alba

Hayden Christensen was horrified when he was told he’d have to do a sex scene with Jessica Alba noting that it was one of the “scariest moments in his life.” I should probably mention it’s because he thought Jessica was really pretty.

“I was just so nervous. Really nervous. Running around with a lightsaber is really pretend, but when you are put in a situation where the scene you are doing become so real, it is terrifying!”

Is this kid gay? Even mentioning “sex scene” and “Jessica Alba” in the same sentence would cause me to pounce on her like a hungry bobcat on an injured bird. It doesn’t matter if the complete sentence was “Security, escort this gentleman off the premises. Jessica Alba is about to perform a sex scene.” By the time they arrived, I’d be mounted on her, thrusting away like a horny dog on a leg. My retarded grin wouldn’t even fade as security punched me in the kidneys to get me off her.

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