Victoria Beckham

Victoria Beckham and husband David have been indulging in Geisha facials, here on in to be known as bird poo facials. Victoria, having long battled with acne, says she discovered the miracle beauty treatment after learning the local Japanese women achieved their unblemished complexion by smearing nightingale feces over their faces. When Victoria returned to the US, she found a few salons in New York that offered the $200 facials. The Daily Mail reports, “She tried it and loved how great her skin looked. She also uses a cream derived from nightingale poo at home.”

Did Victoria actually see the Japanese women putting this on their faces or did they just tell her the most ridiculous thing they could think of. Was there stifled laughter when they described in broken English that covering their face with bird crap was the best thing they’ve ever done? Did they at any point after she left chuckle, “Heh heh heh. Stupid wanker.” Because these are all signs that they might not have been 100% honest.