PEOPLE doesn’t take lists very seriously

PEOPLE’s 100 Most Beautiful issue reads like a Hallmark sympathy card. Number one on the list is Christina Applegate. What? Is this because she had a mastectomy? Or is this one of those things like “100 Most Beautiful People (on the inside)?” This is so infuriating. Where’s Megan Fox? Other celebs included on the list are Halle Berry, Angelina Jolie and Jennier Lopez which are staples in your standard “Beautiful People” list.

If they’re going to put Christina Applegate as the cover girl, they might as well have put Knut the polar bear at #86, that cat that slides through boxes at #73 and that girl at Starbucks who I swear is really into me at #15.