Paris has good friends, maybe

Paris Hilton

In an attempt to make the best out of a bad situation, Paris’ friends extol (or mock) the benefits of being incarcerated with other criminals who may or may not want to cause our socialite bodily harm. As delusional as Paris herself, friends of the dim one almost seem green with envy as they claim Paris will lose weight, gain street cred and look more beautiful coming out than going in. Kind of like Taco Bell.

“It’s going to make her more famous than ever. In jail, she’s going to get enviably skinny, and without any make-up or products her hair and skin will finally be able to breathe, so they’ll look amazing, too. Plus she’s going to get all that street cred.”

They fail to mention Paris could come out tattooed, not by choice. Possibly with a tear drop under her wonky eye. Her seemingly unmarked skin may also bear a shiv scar from when she refused to tongue that one inmate’s unkempt anus. Hint for next time: Pretend it’s a Dove chocolate bar covered with nuts.

On the other hand, writer David Patrick Columbia, billed as in with the Hiltons, has a different outlook. He says this may be the end of Paris Hilton. David, Paris is like a cockroach. Not even a nuclear blast would end her death grip on idiocy.

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2 Comments on "Paris Hilton Performs A DJ Set In Saint-Tropez"

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I wish people would at least use enough of the cheesy “they let you grab them by the pussy” to remind people he was bragging about the things gold diggers let rich guys do.

Obama was actually a bigger racist than Trump but the “Nobel Prize Winner” is given a free pass by the liberal media and KoolAid drinking Democrats because he was something new and had to be praised and protected because of his color. His administration was racked with corruption (IRS, State Department, DOJ, FBI, NSA, Benghazi coverup, etc.), race relations deteriorated significantly (Baltimore, Detroit, Chicago, Dallas, Travon Martin, The Beer Summit, Black Lives Matter, Al Sharpton, Jeremiah Wright, etc.) under useless Barry. He gave us Hillary Clinton, hilariously calling her “the most qualified person ever to run for POTUS!” Together they… Read more »
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