Kristie Alley

After three years of being the spokesperson for Jenny Craig, Kirstie Alley decided to part ways with the weight loss program and start her own. Alley said: “I want to create something new that will help millions of people end the seemingly never ending fatty-roller coaster ride.”

That line was only a taste of the seven paragraph statement Alley sent to PEOPLE magazine. Yea, seven paragraphs. Fatty has a lot of time on her hands to write something so tedious. You’d think she’d be huffing and puffing after picking up a pen, but no, Kirstie Alley once again continues to amaze us all.