A few days of hyperventilating in a brown paper bag later, Jessica Simpson put on her happy face and told Us that she isn’t flipping out and she’s actually real happy about Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo’s engagement.
“I am extremely, extremely happy for him,” she said in the interview, released Thursday morning. “I don’t know where all those rumors came from. My mom actually called me and said that everyone was saying that I was ‘saddened.’ I was just in complete shock. I couldn’t be more happy for Nick.
“Our relationship was over a really long time ago, and it would be nice if everyone could move on with us and really just celebrate the love between him and Vanessa [Minnillo],” she went on. “I do, and I really wish them nothing but the best”
Said Jessica Simpson while violently stabbing a Nick Lachey voodoo doll with a 10-inch hunting knife.
Land Ho!!! Might that be the USS Simpson? Argh!
All you got to do now is scale her and plant a flag in her. The flag in this case being your penis.
She’s getting rather large.
The funny thing is the description for this was that she lost weight.