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Lady Gaga Launching Her Own Bottled Water

Much like Justin Bieber pretending his laptop was stolen as a buildup to the debut of his new video with Nicki Minaj, a few people think Lady Gaga’s recent 25lb weight gain and possible subsequent weight loss is a buildup for her new rumored “healthy drinking water brand.” A brand that has been in the works for months.

The NYDN says Gaga’s people are getting ready to launch a big marketing campaign for her rumored bottled water. “Everyone at Gaga HQ is keeping very tight-lipped. There are plans being prepared for marketing strategies.”

The source went on, “We know that the water drink is due out in the near future.” Adding, “No one has seen prototypes of the bottle.” My guess is, and I’m just spit-balling here, cylindrical.

A Lady Gaga branded drinking water sounds unappetizing considering how weird she likes to make everything. This thing will probably be a viscous red and she’ll pitch it like, “It only LOOKS like period blood but TASTES exactly like water.”

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Hummm this picture must have been taken beorfe Rebecca\’s teeth were pulled out so savagely, in her living room, by an Amish member of the community. Oh! But wait, she is already dressed in English clothes, so I guess she went back to the Amish teeth-puller instead of a Dentist, even though, clearly she is not dressed Amish. Really?!! Something is not adding up here! Gig\’s up!!

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