Subway Jared: ”Middle School Girls Are Hot’

Molester alert! Subway Jared’s house recently got raided this week in connection with a child porn investigation. At the time, the police said he “has not been detained, arrested or charged with any crime or offense.” What they mean is, there’s a ton of computers here and it’s gonna take us awhile to download all these child porn pics. Well, let’s not be surprised if an arrest comes soon.

What actually led to the raid were comments Jared Fogle made to a Florida journalist. Florida! Again, it’s Florida. According to the unidentified woman, they would tour schools in the area and Fogle would say repeatedly “middle school girls are hot”. Which does not sound good if  the director of your charity organization was arrested for child porn and also is into bestiality. From WWSB:

The woman said Fogle made several other inappropriate comments, but she declined to go into detail.

“They weren’t jokes. They were very serious,” the woman said.

The comments alarmed her so much that she contacted authorities. She later wore a wire and recorded phone conversations with Fogle.

Whatever else he said must have been horrible enough to get the FBI involved and have her wear a wire. That’s Mafia s**t right there.

Even though Fogle hasn’t been charged yet, I’d bet 50-to-1 it happens. Especially when you start hearing about his past. Like when he started up a porn rental service at Indiana University. Way back in 2007, Best Week ever had the deets on Fogle’s side gig:

His porn collection was vast and extensive, and Fogle took his business pretty seriously. A video would run a patron a dollar a day (cheap!), and people would come from all over to take advantage of the deal. Needless to say, Jared had enough porn to keep his customers happy.

And you think he started eating Subway because it was healthy? Nah, there’s more to it.

In fact, what got Jared hooked on Subway in the first place was laziness. The sandwich chain had opened a branch on the first floor of Jared’s dorm, and what with his busy porn company, Jared began eating the sandwiches out of extreme laziness. It was the closest fast food available!

This dude is fishy. He better enjoy those Subway sandwiches while he can. Pretty soon, he’s gonna start losing weight on a steady diet of prison food and butt rape.

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8 years ago

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