Catholic School Forced to Cover Statue of Saint Breadcock the Elder

I was raised Catholic, and if there’s one thing Catholics love, it’s statues. They’re pretty much everywhere. Everyone in my family has at least one statue of the baby Jesus attached to a flower planter and a statue of the Virgin Mary in their backyard somewhere. And of course there are statues of saints everywhere. It’s enough to make you think Mohammed was on to something with the whole “no pictures, please” thing.

Sometimes, however, the Catholic predilection for statues pays off big time. Today is one of those times, friend, because I give to you the statue commissioned by Blackfriars Priory School in Adelaide, Australia, a sculpture that has replaced that Bon Scott statue in Fremantle as the best statue in Australia.

Yeah, just a normal Catholic statue of a saint handing a young boy a roughly penis-sized loaf of bread from his crotch. Happens all the time. I have often described my own penis as being vaguely like a baguette to soon-to-be-disappointed women.

I must give props to RT for this next tweet. This is some next level double entendre work, and I tip my hat to you, sirs and madams.

Yes, the school will unfortunately be covering the statue until it can be altered to be a little less suggestive. But luckily for us, photos of this glorious statue will live on the internet forever.

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3 years ago

*laughs hysterically*

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