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Paris Hilton Will Keep the Ring

As we all know, Paris Hilton’s engagement to Chris Zylka has come to a tragic end, much to the crushing devastation of fans everywhere. But on the upside, everyone can now watch the drama that comes with such a fallout. Hilton has already taken to Instagram to reassure everyone about how great she is.

However, rumor has it that Paris hasn’t given back the $2 million ring that Chris Zylka presented to her. Zylka wants it back. Apparently, he’s hoping she’ll return it of her own accord. The law in California says that whoever ends the engagement (in this case, it’s Paris) relinquishes the rights to the ring. Although, one of the other rumors in circulation is that Zylka got an awesome deal on the ring because of Paris’s jewelry hookup. If you’re at all curious, here is what the engagement ring looked like:

As I’m drinking my nightly glass of chardonnay, I can only certainly see where the problem lies. I don’t care if that thing cost $2 million. It’s a fucking ugly ring. I’m sorry, but it really is. It doesn’t have to do with how gaudy that ring looks (and it definitely is), but what is this fascination with pear-shaped jewelry? It’s not proportional and it just looks wrong.

Also, if you’re at all superstitious, one such engagement ring legend states that pear-shaped engagement rings are bad luck. The shape resembles a tear-drop, which means, sad wife and sad life. Well, that would explain a lot. They got off to a bad engagement right from the beginning and it was all downhill from there. Tell your next fiance to get a less cursed ring, Paris.

But I still maintain that these two just fucking forgot they were supposed to get married.

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