Brent Spiner Wants to Fight Angela Lansbury, May Have to Go Through Dick Van Dyke

Remember how Justin Bieber wanted to fight Tom Cruise despite Cruise being 31 years his senior and a tiny manlet? Yeah, he’s a giant douche and Tom Cruise would beat his ass even if he is only four feet tall. He has to impress Zaddy Miscavige, after all.

Well, Bieber isn’t the only person calling out much older celebrities for an MMA fight. Brent Spiner, who played Commander Data on Star Trek: The Next Generation, couldn’t quite find a celebrity with the same age gap, but he did send out a challenge to 93-year-old Dame Angela Lansbury, most famous for Murder, She Wrote, that show your mom watches about the old lady who solves murders.

I mean, I would watch that fight. My money is on Dame Angela, by the way. Data’s biggest tough guy moment was petting a cat, Jessica Fletcher lived in what has to be the per-capita murder capital of the entire world. Seriously, Cabot Cove is a small, sleepy town in Maine like Stars’ Hollow on Gilmore Girls. But they did 264 episodes of Murder, She Wrote, which means once a week there’s a dead body in the town square of a Thomas Kinkade painting and no one really bats an eye.

Luckily for Spiner, he’s not going to have to come to blows with Miss Marple Jessica Fletcher anytime soon, not on Dick Van Dyke’s watch at any rate. The entire exchange is hilarious.

These guys are national treasures. It’s a shame they’re a million years old so they’ll die soon and Justin Bieber will probably live long enough to become immortal.

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