ESC

GOP Couldn’t Even Nab a Justin Bieber Performance for $5 Million

The GOP offered Justin Bieber $5 million, like Dr Evil money or some shit, to perform at an event during the GOP national convention. According to TMZ, they couldn’t get him, but not because he’s a good person or anything.

I mean obviously. For one, the Biebs is Canadian, so what does he give a fuck if our president is the devil as long as the devil pays. For another, that was literally the largest paycheck a singer was ever offered for a single gig and it was agreed that it would be handed to him before he even got on stage. Why did he end up turning it down? Turns out his manager is with Hilary Clinton.

Justin’s manager, a grown man named Scooter, has been sucking on Hillary Clinton‘s shriveled teets for awhile now. He even had a fundraiser for her at his home. Scooter Braun told Justin he could do the gig if he wanted, but he would no longer be his manager.

Ouch.

Turns out they also lied to Braun and told him Lebron James would be at the GOP’s convention, which he found out was a lie in about 10 seconds. On top of that, Justin’s backup band is mostly black Americans, and they didn’t want to fucking support Donald Trump and inbred America either.

Turning down the show is probably the first moral thing Justin Bieber has ever done, though I doubt he really cares.

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