Thandie Newton’s Sex Talk with Her Kids Started with ‘Daddy Has a Beautiful Penis’

Thandie Newton’s sex talk was probably better than the one any of us got, but it still kinda weirds me out.

Most of us either got some weird sex talk from our parents that basically taught us nothing and instilled horrible shame in us, or were left alone to Google whether it’s a dick or a chicken wing if you know what I mean.

In a recent cover story for The Edit, Thandie Newton revealed that she did a much better job than most of our parents, probably.

“I said, ‘Daddy has a beautiful penis, which enters Mama, and these two precious parts of us join together…’ A few days later, Ripley came home from school, saying, ‘Mummy, I had to tell Don he was wrong today. Don said sex is when a man makes his willy go really hard and then beats the woman with it’…Lucky I got to her first.”

A+ Thandie Newton. Sounds like Don got his sex ed from our current president.