ESC

Teacher Has Sex With Watermelon in Front of Student on World’s Worst Field Trip

People do some weird, disturbing stuff sexually, like having sex with a coconut full of maggots or dating Elon Musk. Having sex with a watermelon in front of one of your students might be a new low, though. Aside from Elon Musk, that is. Ugh, what is wrong with Grimes? You know, aside from the obvious.

The man, an Ontario teacher named Damir Bulic, is on trial facing four counts of performing an indecent act and one count of invitation to sexual touching.

“We started having conversations about pornography and stuff,” the now 19-year-old man recalled while testifying at Damir Bulic’s Superior Court trial. “He showed me what he did with the watermelon. He had sex with it. He took a knife, cut a hole and had sex with it …

“I was three, four feet away. It was kind of weird … It was pretty out of the blue that he did that. There was no indication he was going to do that.”

After the incident with the watermelon, the student said he and Bulic put some steaks on the barbecue and had a smoke and beer, something they frequently did. He said the incident did not affect his friendship with Bulic, as “I never really thought of it at that age.”

So the teacher didn’t have sex with the kid, he just hung out with him and fucked fruits in front of him, like a webcomic character from 2002.

I don’t get it. This is the second story of adults just hanging out with kids I’ve written today. It’s not even like they’re related and they feel sorry for the kids because they don’t have any friends, they’re just going “these are some cool-ass 14-year-olds.”

The kid also recorded the teacher getting a blow job and jacking off on the hood of a car, which is nothing like anything I’ve ever done with any of my friends at any age. And in true Trailer Park Boys fashion, the teacher and the student’s mother got into a fight outside a Tim Horton’s after she found out he had bought the kid a carton of cigarettes.

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