Poor dolphin

Sad news out of Dubai today. The dolphin Paris Hilton made out with last week has been put to sleep.

Lindsay and Paris hate Kate Gosselin

While others think Kate Gosselin is a bitch because she’s an overbearing control freak, Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton think Kate’s a bitch because she’s pushing them off the covers of weeklies.

Paris is back with Doug

Paris’ epic whore saga continues. A day after sucking face with Cristiano Ronaldo and mere hours after her ex, Doug Reinhardt released this statement: “Doug refuses to take part of this ridiculous media circus.

Paris moves fast

Just a day after her break-up, Paris Hilton has already moved on.

Paris Hilton is single

Remember when Paris Hilton hinted at maybe settling down with her boyfriend of six months Doug Reinhardt?

Paris Hilton might marry in summer

Tired of whoring her junk around Hollywood, Bigfoot may be ready to settle down and hinted at a possible summer wedding with Dough Reinhardt.

It could have been Paris

While there still isn’t solid evidence that the Eminem stunt was staged (there’s speculation that it was to a point), one thing that is known is that Eminem’s face was producer Mark Burnett’s second choice for Sacha Cohen to stick his bare ass in.

Paris Hilton was thrown off a boat

Paris Hilton and boyfriend Doug Reinhardt — starting out a story like that never bodes well — were invited to a yacht party by a guy named David Furnish, Elton John’s husband.

Someone has a good sense of humor

Cops were called to Paris Hilton’s house early this morning after neighbors grew tired of hearing her and Dough Reinhardt screaming and yelling all night.

Paris Hilton didn’t know

Worldwide Entertainment Group is suing Paris Hilton to the tune of $8.3 million for failing to promote National Lampoon’s Pledge This! as agreed upon.

Paris’ boyfriend got into a fight

Paris Hilton and her new boyfriend Doug Reinhardt were involved in an altercation with a bouncer at Fontainebleau in Maimi.

Never again

Kathy Griffin flashed Paris Hilton outside of Kitson yesterday afternoon for her show.