Tesla Model 3 Owners Report Their Teslas Fall Apart in the Rain

Elon Musk is one of my favorite people in the world. Not because I actually like him, but because he perfectly encapsulates the way a rich moron can use having a lot of money to trick people into thinking he’s smart. I can’t think of a single better example of this. Okay, I can think of one.

It was barely a month ago that Elon Musk was calling someone a pedophile for saying that the “submarine” he made to rescue the Thai boys trapped in that flooded cave was no help, so it’s especially funny that owners of the Tesla Model 3 are reporting it falls apart when you get it wet.

That second user also helpfully explained the design flaw that causes the bumper to fly off of the car when it gets wet.

So here's the problem: there is shielding on the bottom which should deflect water around the bumper. It is right around the centerline of the tires. That shielding gets torn (it's a fiberglass type cloth material) then water is diverted to the bumper which acts like a parachute

— BenjiFranks (@Benj1Franks) August 12, 2018

I’m sure Tesla cars don’t have any other serious problems, though. Oh, wait, earlier this year Tesla recalled half of all the cars the company had ever produced because the steering wheel is faulty.

They also sometimes just catch on fire for no reason.

What I’m saying is Elon Musk would have killed those kids. His submarine would have caught fire or fallen apart or opened a portal that summoned eldritch horrors to destroy the Earth and all of its inhabitants or something. I don’t know how he would have killed those kids, but that cave would be piled high with dead kids and grieving parents if Elon Musk’s tech had been let anywhere near them.